Sital Ruparelia

1. Give yourself permission to be ‘imperfect’

You haven’t got your ‘to do’ list under control, your mail box is overflowing, you haven’t got all your 2010 goals mapped out,  your resume/CV/business plan isn’t perfect, you’re not networking as much as you ‘should’ be.

Away from work you’re not spending enough times with your kids or partner, you’re not eating your 5 fruit and vegetables portions a day, you’re not going to the gym 3 times a week.

It’s okay…

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Ladies, what if…..

You were in a toxic relationship with a man who didn’t treat you particularly well.  He had little awareness about your needs, didn’t hold a lot of respect for you in private and often was quite disrespectful of you in public. And as a result you suffered a dip in confidence and constantly wished you could just get back to being your old self again.

Now tell me, if you were in this situation, what would your girlfriends be telling you?

“Walk away…” they’d say,

“…you deserve much better ……”

For a while, you’d probably create all sorts of excuses for him – it’s not his fault, he’s having problems at work, he’s got financial problems, he doesn’t mean it…..and oh, maybe I’m exaggerating and things aren’t quite that bad.

In time, your girlfriends would convince you that the more you accepted and tolerated the situation, the worse things would get. The situation would become toxic and affect your health, relationships, career and self confidence.

So you either need to:

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Question:

“I’m only 3 weeks into my new job and I’m exhausted and stressed already.

I’m suffering from information overload and can’t sleep as I’m worried about all the things I need to learn.

I’m so distracted with helping my colleagues that I don’t have enought time to work on my work and learning.  I’m trying to be helpful, make friends and be a good team player but in doing so worry that I’m diluting my progress.

I’m trying to leave the office at sensible hours and not work silly hours like I used to in my last job.  But I’m constantly thinking about work outside office hours and so feeling stressed and exhausted the next day. Which makes me less productive and so creates a viscious cycle.

My boss is great and tells me I’m doing well. But it doesnt feel like it – i’m tired, stressed and at times overwhealmed.

What should I do?”

My Answer:

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